“And the demons begged Him, saying, “If You are going to cast us out, send us into the herd of pigs.”
And He said to them, “Go!” And they came out and went into the pigs;
and behold, the whole herd rushed down the steep bank into the sea and drowned in the waters.” (Matthew 8:31-32)
(Written in late February 2023)
The fog that night loomed over the highways across northwest South Carolina; for someone unfamiliar with those roads, taking even a glance to the roadside could have proven hazardous. Yet, out of the corner of my eye, in the right median, I spotted a single deer grazing in the thickness of the night. Maybe one mile later, a large herd of deer stood roadside like an army. Thankfully the only thing leaping was my heart as I reached out to my Heavenly Father. The deer were His response to prayers: everything was going to be alright. He was with me, protecting me and guiding me. He heard me and reminded me that I am loved, at a time when I was physically very alone.
Tearing down every stronghold
The 13-hour drive from Florida’s Space Coast back to northeast Tennessee was very taxing due to both the circumstances and very heavy traffic., littered with construction – surprising on a Sunday. Shortly after crossing the Florida/Georgia state line on I-95 North I saw an odd sight: 2 black wild hogs grazing on the side of the road. I won’t share exact details of what the Holy Spirit revealed to me in regard to what the swine represented; it was understood that the swine were the darkness that had been present in my life and it was now cast out, just as Yeshua had cast demons out and into swine. He reminded me of the verse “… and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.” Which is exactly what I’d just experienced and had been for so very long.
———–
(Written June 3, 2023)
The burdens of that darkness had worn me completely down, and receiving this knowledge proved what I already suspected was to come after my mother’s death: His pruning and sanctification. I don’t fear or fret over this process. While it’s never easy to walk through, from the very beginning of my Faith walk I’ve understood the necessity so learned to welcome it. Honestly, I submit myself at Yeshua’s feet and ask for sanctification. I had been well aware that this area of my life was something I continually had to “walk out” with the Lord. This process wasn’t going to be pretty and never would I have anticipated how tightly those spirits would cling to me, or how they would manifest.
In the past I’ve stated how much the enemy hates me; and when we stand against every evil thing swirling around us, he unleashes hell in attempt to keep us bound, or worse, take us down. This battle is exactly what I’ve been fighting since my mom passed: an ongoing spiritual battle that intended I see death. But the battle belonged to Yeshua, and until I figured out what was happening, stopped fighting on my own and stepped aside, He wouldn’t take it from me.
The agonizing pain I had been experiencing was not of this world. What the Holy Spirit walked me through, in order to be victorious over it, took a lot of my seeking the Lord and being open to what He showed me. No matter how ugly. No matter what I had to lay down to be honest with Him and myself. I did what He led me toward because I trust that His vision is 20/20 where mine has been skewed by years of shoving things under the rug.
“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not wage war according to the flesh. 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not fleshly but powerful through God
for the tearing down of strongholds. We are tearing down false arguments 5 and every high-minded thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God.” (2 Cor 10:3-5)
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